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louisehernandez

seeing someone move out of your life is pretty darn heart breakin' and seeing them happier with another is undescribable...thats part of life...people part ways and then they found another... for some its easy to forget but for me its not and so to lessen the pain i have come to the best solution...not hearing or seeing anything from him...the less i see or hear from him the better...i think it helps me move on faster...plus the more i try to think of other things about my life the more i find it easy to let go...i have high hopes for myself now....i want a new beginning...forgive me my friends for being so slow in recuperating...now im taking whatever life has to offer...new challenges and new people...life has never been better...still i get to be afraid sometimes...for the time being i still am and i dont know why???im afraid of rejection or suffering the same pain again...im beginning to think that i maybe really psychotic...or is it because i do so much thinking that i foget to consider certain things...i just have cut that crap now...well...anyway...a little bit of sadness that im feeling right now...still there lies a bunch of hope...tomorrow...maybe....

*smooches*

gracias!

louisehernandez

just got my performance appraisal report last friday from my boss and i need to make a comment about it...i dont find it hard voicing out my opinions but this one's  really tough...how do i get through it? tough man!!what are the things that i should comment about? work environment? my skills? my officemates???what???im confused as always...

its really not that hard telling the HR people and your boss how you feel about certain things except that at the back of my mind there would always be something that what i say might trigger my termination in the company...i'm really scared of that...

i dont want to look like a suck up nor a lefty in the company...i just want it to be plain and simple...but how???how do i express what i feel??wait a minute what is it that i feel anyway....hmmm....dont know really...

will i be penalized if i said something about my appraisal coz really i have some really deep justifications for the categories for which i was graded...hay....help....i need help....

ok....have to leave now and start making that freakin' comment thing....

gracias...

adios!

amigos and amigas...

found this on my files while deleting some of my college days papers...funny how weird my emotions were back then and still is...hehhe..

anyway...i remember writing this entry on one of our sessions in business taxation...no offense to my professor...he was really good naman though i usually find myself sleepy during his class...hehehe...

little sheeps...im seeing and counting little sheeps again...

damn! damn! damn! i'm going into a deep slumber...

interesting topic....compute this compute that...

such monotony i simply cannot deal with...*sigh*

my memory seems to fade away...up up and away...

can somebody help me please...

just a minute of two....

i need some time to stop feeling blue...

Goodness!!it made me rhyme...hahaha...

maybe its the weather..its raining now...

or maybe just the text message that bombard my cellphone...

the complicated and weird me has started again...

feeling nostalgic and all again...

again...i wish i could just hide and fade away....

louisehernandez

ever heard that alias???

i guess...all of you would have known it by now...its the alias of the united states of america...the ever so powerful and rich country of the west...oh i mean the whole world pla...

i got inspired by someones' blog to talk about this attitude of the U.S towards other countries...i mean...they're like the night and shining armor of small countries specially the philippines...ewan ko ba...hindi nmn sila mahilig sa war ano...eto at kakasimula lang nila sa iraq...ngaun eto na nmn at nagbabadya pa ata sa north korea...its like as if he's (uncle sam) saving the whole world from its future destruction...aba! akalain mo un pakialaman ba nmn ung nuclear experimentations ng n. korea...i know that the lives of entire human race is at risk pero di ba? sana man lang these people would not conclude into some things that would later be proven to be wrong???cge nga ung kay sadam ba meron ba sila nakita???di ba wla nmn???o meron nga???di ko din alam...basta all i know is that they found a great or huge amount of money in one sadam's quarters....un lang...bkit nga ba ako naghihimutok sa galit???kc ang daming inosenteng namamatay...nagbubuwis ng buhay para sa isang bagay na ang mabibigyan nga kabutihan ay iisa lamang...kala mo sila lang ang anak ng diyos...ay! ano ba yan...i must be really crazy...its weird having all this opinions again...sorry wla na nmn ako makausap eh...eto na lang watch na lng farenheit 9-11...the whole movie would really change your mine did...astig ni michael moore...

eto na lang...someone sent me this message and it's a fact:

but in truth, present american capitalism, with its ever worsening contradictions, is like a dying old leech which is desperately trying to have a new lease of life by sucking on the young blood of new nations.- Dr. Juan Edberto M. Villegas....

think about that...

louisehernandez

i had a row with my dad last sunday and i still haven't talked to him until now...i mean...we had our fights but it lasted for just a day or two but now three???just kidding....ewan...i kinda messed up really bad..i guess...it started with the present that i gave my mom and dad for their wedding anniversary...well...i guess...the reaction that i got was different from what i was hoping for..then i started talking about his attitude towards us and and his other kids...i think that he's acting too unfair...i mean for us...i know that he hardly spends his time with them but still here we are trying to get his attention...trying all our best to please him but still got nothing not even a pat or a smile from him...i dont know...am i being too unfair for my other brother and sister???i hope not...i still do hold some grudge over my father...he hardly explains anything about that topic...im just pissed with his attitude...ewan...alam ko hindi ako dapat makaramdam ng ganito..matapos ako papagaralin at makatapos at lahat ganito magiging ugali ko..hay...buhay ang saklap...mahirap isipin bkit nga ba ganito ang nagiging ugali ko pagdating sa topic na un...cguro gnun lang tlga...minsan ganito minsan gnyan...si God tlga ang hilig gumawa ng telenovela...actually tayo nmn ang mahilig gumawa nun...bhala na...june told me to let it die down for awhile...cguro un na nga lang ang gagawin ko...

nalulungkot na naman ako...

kelangan ko ng hug...

ay sus!!!

seriously...

good night...

ciao!

louisehernandez

have you ever experienced just talking to a complete stranger and telling them how you feel about certain people? things that have been bothering you for ages...well...i guess that happened to one of my former schoolmates...so here it goes...i went online just to see who's up for some chit chat...of course...as usual the very people i was hoping to be online were not there...maybe they just got home or maybe just like me they are dead tired and instead of going online they would much prefer to talk via sms...hay...people...anyway...back to my previous subject... this girl i was talking about was a former schoolmate whom i never talked to in my entire existence in that school...or so that is what i remember...i won't name names...promise...well...she talks about her pain and the trauma that she got from her ex...things that are quite personal...she said she wants to fall in love again and never have any grudge over that person (i mean the ex)...she dreams of meeting the right man and not collecting the wrong ones...well honey...i guess...some of them are good nman...its just that the choices we or they make produce bad consequences which would later on turn into some kind of a big problem...she talks about healing...i pray for her to have that..really...for me too...lol...from the tone of scripts(the thing that she types in our pm box..tama ba tawag ko dun???)...she looks like she was deeply hurt by that person...i hope she finds closure to that part of her life...i wished her well and bade goodbye...maybe some people are really like that...they want to be heard...they want someone to listen...and not be afraid of being judged...unlike if you tell it to your closests of friends...you would be afraid of what they'ld think...i dont know...its kind of weird to have that conversation with her but it was really nice and very entertaining...i would like to have a chat with her sometime...or even meet up with her...such new insights i got today...and it was really nice...

gud night...sweet dreams...

ciao!

adios amigos and amigas...

smooches...

louisehernandez

wtf! cguro pagod lang tlga ako ngaun...at tila yata lahat ng kamalian at kaimperpektuhan ng tao eh napapansin ko...ewan ko ba...cguro magulo lang tlga ang isip ko ngaun...nasa gitna ako ng pagpapakatotoo at pagkukunwari...minsan gusto ko ng magpakatotoo kaso...tatanggapin kaya nila ako...huhusgahan ba nila ako kapag ako'y "nag-open up" sa kanila...iniisip ko pa lang nawiwindang na ako...pano mo nga ba ipapakita sa mundo kung cno ka tlga???hanep!! may kanta pa atang gnun...basta...gusto ko makilala nila ang totoong ako...pero one thing that hinders me is the fact that maybe they only want a working relationship with me and not something like friends or something else....ewan basta...pagod ako...dami ng tao....pero kaya naman....hay....tulog ko na lang to...

ciao!

sweet dreams....

sana makita ko si peter pan....

weehhhh!!!lois....pauso....

cya cya....cge na...adios amigos and amigas...

louisehernandez

i mean for my life right now...i guess at least for some time people would lead a life like that...im a freakin' creature of habit as you all well know but as far as things are going...im freakin' getting bored and been seriously thinking that my life is best described by just two words...two small words people...mediocre and pathetic... not that mediocrity is not good...but look...im young...im suppose to be having the time of my life right...i just finished college and life has lots to offer for me...everything should be an adventure...is it just me having problems???or am i taking all this too seriously???i guess living in the pace of a college kid is too fast when you're in a grown-up world...ooopps...again i forgot im a grown-up too....how many times do i have to tell that to myself???grrr....am i still in denial...*sigh* i dont know if being an adult or a grown-up makes you boring or is it just me??? are we all facing this kind dilemma???well...things couldn't be changed....i chose this kind of life and i have to live with it day by day...not that i regret my decision but this was what God gave me...and i have to be thankful for it...i just have to vent it all out at least with this kind of medium...i guess when i'm writing about things that's been stocking up inside me i begin to relax and become rejuvenated...ano to spa???...at least it has a good effect on me....hehehe....plus it improves my vocabulary...naks...seriously...that was my first goal when i had this blog account to basically improve and master the english grammar..i just dont know if im improving or simply just the same as my previous blog entries...hopefully it would be the former...hehehe...anyway...my topic's again been kind of "sabog"....guess....im not such a good story teller...*sigh*

hope everythings good for you all...

take care...

ciao!!!

xoxo 

louisehernandez

my transcript of records has not been released yet...why???coz i haven't got the time to edit my thesis and have it bookbind...i super need it pa naman...so here i am working my ass off re-typing my thesis and hopefully by friday i would be able to submit it and finally get my tor...ay sus!

im waiting for my mom to come home...i need to buy some new shoes for work...been working for two months now and i think i need a new pair...and some clothes too...have to go shopping...weee!!!!hopefully i would buy things within my budget or else im dead meat...my savings are pretty low right now...in short im broke...*sigh*i need my next paycheck fast...just kidding....lol...

i got some great news from my old friends way back in high school namely jamie and johann...ayos!!!...got a few messages from these guys and im pretty happy to hear things from them since they were the best guy buds i had in high school...its nice rekindling old friendships...brings back good and  bad memories but mostly good nmn...

got to talk with my officemate about certain stuff in the office...well...surprise surprise...we do have the sentiments...we need someone to talk to...fast...ahmm....sir phat are you free this week???come visit us nmn...miss ka nmin....

i miss some people terribly....hmmm...that would be pillar, shan and ella...i haven't seen you for how many months already...have you guys gone into hiding???magparamdam nmn...piso lang ang pagpaparamdam....hehehe...joke!!

hmmm.....enough said...gotta get back to work...

ciao!!!!

love writing these past few days....really....guess im not so tired after all...lol...

ciao!!!!

xoxo